Well, I must say, sometimes I feel so smitten with my kids. I know most of the time as a stay at home mom, it gets frustrating just trying to handle all of the duties as well as the disciplining, the housework, the cooking, the laundry, etc.
But sometimes you just have to stop for a minute and really LOOK at your kids. Really watch their faces as they excitedly describe something they have discovered, or even ask you a neverending question, "Can I have......?"
The innocence and the sweetness can melt away all of the layers of thoughts of "I gotta do this, I should really do that, I really don't want to do THAT!" and then, "Oh CRAP! I forgot to do that.......!"
Blake today was hiding his arm in his tshirt and excitedly pretending that he lost it. "Look! My arm is gone, mommy!"
I said, "Oh NO! Where did it go?"
Pop! out comes the little arm and he spreads out his fingers and cries, "There it is!" with just the cutest expression of surprise and pride. :)
I wish I'd had a camera with me and I could catch all those little special expressions, because sometimes he absolutely clams up in front of the camera, just pretending that he doesn't really want to be photographed even though I know he does. SO getting a photo of good him is a trick. :)
Emily, herself, is a bag of tricks. She is so full of life that I don't know how to take it sometimes. I have always been so "reserved" I guess you would say. There is not a shy bone in that girls body! She doesn't just hug you, she attacks you! She doesn't just smile at other kids, she shouts across the play area, "Hey!!! What's your name?" and then will proceed to give a total stranger all of her toys and her affection, whether they want it or not.
I really need to spend more alone time with her. Before Blake was born, she had me all to herself and we had so many moments of sweet, precious bonding. I remember worrying with great tears sometimes, while I was pregnant with Blake, that I wouldn't be able to love another child like I loved Emily. I really did not see how I could ever share my love with another child. I just adored her. I still adore her and she she knows she holds a special place in my heart because she is my first.
I was just telling her last night how special she was. I said, "You know what Emily?" She said, "What?" looking up at me with those big brown eyes, full of expectation.
"God made you soo special, that there is no one in the world like you!" She broke out into a big grin, very self-satisfied, basking in the knowledge. (I've told her this before, but she never tires of it:)
"In fact, He broke the mold after He made you." I said in a sort of conspiratorial way.
"What's a mold?" she said, confused.
"You know how we make cookies with cookie cutters? Well, you can make lots of cookies that are all the same with a cookie cutter. A mold is like that. You can make lots of the same things with a mold. But he broke the "Emily" mold so there will never be another Emily like you ever again!"
And then I said, "And you know what is even more amazing?"
"What?!" she says in a whisper.
"God gave you to ME! He must love me a lot."
She was on cloud nine! It was so sweet to see how she just lights up like a star when she knows she is loved. She gets really quiet, but she just glows!
It is one of the only times I can get her to sit still, when we have special time like that. She was actually a calmer child before Blake came into the picture. She was so excited to have her little brother! She still is, she loves him to death. But I can tell that no matter how much attention she gets from me, she misses having me all to herself.
I miss those special times we had together, too. I have tried to make sure we go out on little "dates" together, and she absolutely loves it. But I need to make it more regular and more frequent. She just has so much love to give and she is larger than life itself. She needs more attention than I ever did as a child.
So as far as the laundry goes, and other things that are constantly taking up precious time.....
I really love to do deep cleaning and even organizing, but it seems I can never get to them often enough because of the other things that are constant sources of frustration and is just neverending "busy-work". My main sources of frustration on a daily basis are:
Laundry, Dishes, Toys and Papers! (Misc papers and mail and just disorganized paperwork)
So I have decided I am going to try an experiment.
Laundry: I am going to set out a small amount of outfits for each child and myself included, like no more than a week or 10 days worth. I will either pack or set aside all other clothes and these will be the only things we can wear. I am aslo going to weed out unused clothing this week and donate or sell them.
Dishes: Also, I am going to use only disposable dishes for a while just to get on top of things. Cutting out the neverending stream of dishes in the sink will free up some time to tackle other projects.....lol
Toys: I have already tackled the toy issue. I packed up all the kids toys after a particularly bad afternoon outing where they refused to obey me. So I told them that ALL of their toys were going in garbage bags, and they could earn a toy back each time they obey me, THE FIRST TIME I say something. If I have to ask them more than once, it doesn't count. If they disobey again, a previously earned toy goes back in the garbage bags.
So most of the toys are in the garage right now.......
Papers: As far as the paperwork goes...that needs serious attention! My office is a source of tension everyday so I am just going to have to tackle it bit by bit.
But spending time with the kids has got to be a priority and cutting down on unneccessary work will help with that......
I just am amazed sometimes. I will look at them and think, "Where are my little babies?" They grow too fast!
Time is of the essence, all you moms out there! Join me, all you who labour and are heavy laden! Let go of the things that don't matter and streamline your life so you can ENJOY it!
Blog Ya Later!
